Rodney Dangerfield Quotes (page 4)
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I told my doctor that when I woke up in the morning I couldn`t stand looking at myself in the mirror. He said, `At least we know your vision is perfect.`
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I`m very lucky. Years ago they had images, like W.C. Fields, Laurel and Hardy, Groucho Marx. But today, I think I`m the only one around with an image. And that image is something everyone identified with. They all feel life treated `em wrong and they got ...
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My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out. I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it.
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My wife`s jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.
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I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn`t met me yet.
